Heartbreak...

So I’ve got dumped…again. Let’s go back about two months back, first or second week of January. It was a typical after work weeknight for me. In bed watching Kardashians with a glass of red wine. Since I have watched this episode of Kardashians about 100 times before I decided to go on Grindr and kill some time before going to sleep. And there he was, the reason behind my latest heartbreak, lets call him Malcolm. Tall, very handsome, older than me with gorgeous face and full juicy lips. Now you all going to think I’m totally crazy (sometimes) and stupid (not) but it only took few hour of chatting to him for me to fall in love with him. After chatting for several days we finally decided to meet for a rather cliché date, we met in Central London and was planning to go only for few drinks to G-A-Y bar,  before I knew we was dancing the night away in G-A-Y Late. To be honest I don’t remember much from that night, not because I was wasted but because I was drunk in love with him. We danced and kissed the night away till it was time to part our ways and say good byes. After that night I knew he is the one for me and I want to spend the rest of my life with him. The longer we have been together the more we realized how perfect we are for each other, we wanted the same things in life, we loved and hated the same things. We clicked completely. My only major problem was his job, he was working as a nurse in Intensive Care Unit which meant he worked 12 hour day or night shifts. That meant we couldn't see each other as we wanted to but we managed. Everything was going fine, it was a total smooth sailing till the other night when I started talking about promise rings and that it would be nice to get them for each other at some point. I hinted that I’m ready to give him a promise ring now and then it all started. He told me that he isn't ready yet to promise me that we going to spend rest of our lives together. It was like someone has slapped me across the face since I was already thinking about ordering a promise ring and booking a trip to Paris for his birthday in April. That evening he said another thing that caused me to be get even more upset, he planned on doing same shift work for another 10 years which would mean I’ll be seeing him few times a week for next 10 years. I’ve left his place and came home got into bed and cried my self to sleep. I’ve decided not to talk to him for next few days to think about it all, he has send me few messages explaining things he said, I didn't reply to them right away. Once I was ready to talk to him I’ve somehow ended up on his Facebook and I’ve noticed he unfriended me, when I messaged him he told me its over and he doesn't want to hear from me anymore since we’re both incompatible and I’m selfish because I didn't like the fact he's doing the job he is doing. He never gave me a chance to talk to him properly face to face and explain my point of view. When I went over to his place to return the valentine gift he gave me since I didn't want any reminders of him and was looking for an excuse to see him and get a last goodbye kiss he didn't even let me in, just looked out the window and told me to go away. Later on I’ve received a text from him threatening me with police if I don't leave him alone. I still don’t fully understand why he dumped me and never gave me a chance to talk to him calmly face to face. The person I went on a first date with wasn't the same person that shattered my heart into pieces. He has turned from an amazing loving and caring guy to cold stoned heart monster. Maybe one day I will get a chance to talk to him face to face and say what I had to say. Have you even been dumped so rapidly by someone who you were madly in love with you? Has anyone ever turned 180 degrees within no time and u questioned your self how could have fallen in love with someone like that? Also if it has happen to you, how did you deal with it? I’ve decided to turn this heartbreak into a new series of posts on here written by me about mostly gay and sometimes straight relationships, dating and looking for a love so deep that the ocean would be jealous.

Matt XoXo